


Secrets

by Injeolmi_hyuck



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Gay, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan is Whipped, M/M, Mentioned Jeon Heejin, Oblivious Huang Ren Jun, Summer, Summer Vacation, there's even a rainbow hammock in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:29:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23203978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Injeolmi_hyuck/pseuds/Injeolmi_hyuck
Summary: "There are different types of drunk people, some can't stop giggling whilst others are able to find the most ridiculous reasons to take off every single piece of clothing on their body. Renjun was a mixture between the giggly type and the careless type. The latter caused him to reveal every secret under the sun if Donghyuck didn’t make sure to change the topic quickly enough before he did some real damage."- basically, Donghyuck compulsively doing (not so straight) things to prevent a drunk Renjun from spilling a secret
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan, Jeon Heejin/Huang Ren Jun
Comments: 6
Kudos: 91





	Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> completely forgot I had this all done, written and edited, just chilling in my google drive for six months... oops
> 
> hope, you gain some joy out of this <3

Whoever said summer break was the most exciting time of the year was a fucking liar. At least for those who weren't rich and couldn't afford a trip around the world from Paris to Shanghai, spending at least a few days at the most expensive hotels because guess whose daddy was the CEO of a successful phone case company.

Unable to handle the quiet in his house (the downside of having just one brother who already moved out), Donghyuck sought out the presence of someone else to spend his time with. Naturally, the first person he thought of was his best friend.

Donghyuck, who was lying on his bed and staring at the ceiling, turned to the side to grab his phone off the bedside table, ignoring the Instagram notifications which were letting him know that his other friends added to their stories. He didn't have to open the app in order to know they were posing on a beach in Bali or showing off their authentic Italian pizza in Rome.

"Juni! I'm bored!" Donghyuck whined into his phone, sending off the voice message and waiting for the little green dot to show up, indicating that Renjun was online and hopefully listening to his complaints, like always.

Another five minutes of him staring at the ceiling and biting his nails later, his phone buzzed on his chest and he quickly unlocked his phone to play the two-second long reply he got.

“ _ Then come over you idiot! _ ”

A pleased expression spread on Donghyuck’s face.  _ Idiot _ was obviously an insult but it always sounded sort of affectionate whenever Renjun called him that, almost like a pet name… or maybe he just didn’t mind being called that by someone who's just as big of an idiot as himself.

Donghyuck got up from his bed and made his way over to his best friend’s house, the smile still present on his lips. Fortunately, Renjun’s home was only a ten-minute foot walk away but the heat of this particularly humid August day made it feel like a marathon through the desert.

“I’m dying!” Donghyuck complained as he walked through the gate of Renjun’s garden. 

“Stop whining about the weather and get your ass over here!” He heard Renjun call him over from his little rainbow-colored hammock. A few weeks ago, the two boys had worked hours at getting it up the big oak tree in Renjun’s garden and the latter had basically been living in it ever since.

Donghyuck walked over, the sun not bothering him as much anymore now that he saw what was awaiting him. A nice shady spot right next to Renjun, couldn’t get any better than that.

He only stopped in front of the hammock for a short second to examine his friend’s clothing choice, his eyebrows rising at the sight of the shorts, exposing a whole lot of Renjun's pale skinny legs. Donghyuck figured they weren’t supposed to be  _ this _ short, but through sliding down the fabric of the hammock with his body, they rose up even further. 

The oversized T-shirt didn’t help either.

“Ew, you’re sweaty!” Renjun screeched as Donghyuck dumped his body onto the hammock right next to him, his wet skin pressing against Renjun’s cool one.

“I told you I’m dying!”

Despite the fact that his sweaty body was all over Renjun’s, which was probably everything but pleasant, Renjun didn’t pull away or look distressed in any way. Even the frown had disappeared by the time Donghyuck found a comfortable position and faced the dark green leaves hanging off the tree above them.

They stayed like this for a while, the only sound being the chirping of the birds and the faint noise of someone mowing their lawn a few houses down the street.

Those were the moments Donghyuck valued most in his life, the ones in which he was so content and careless he almost felt like floating. Being squished into this rainbow hammock right next to Renjun definitely counted as one of those moments. Just hearing the other laugh at something he'd said got him to a level of happiness he didn't seem to be able to reach when he was with someone else.

Donghyuck really loved spending time with his best friend.

"There's this party at some college guy's house tonight. You wanna go? I really need to get drunk." Donghyuck should probably be concerned, but he also knew Renjun. That guy could drink. Not that he got drunk on a regular basis but whenever they went partying together, Donghyuck was the one who ended up with his head over the toilet and Renjun rubbing his back, not the other way round.

"A college party? Do you even know someone older than nineteen who isn’t related to you?"

"My cousin lives in the same neighborhood so I've seen the house before,” Renjun answered, seemingly unbothered by his best friend’s attempt to tease him.

Donghyuck 's mouth curved into a smile as he threw his friend a side look. The orange afternoon sun made his skin glister, most likely because of the sweat, but nice to look at nonetheless. It vaguely reminded him of those vampires from Twilight who were all too handsome to be real… taking that into consideration, it was a perfectly fitting description of Renjun’s visuals. 

"Why do you need to get drunk anyway?"

Renjun groaned. "Don't ask, you already know why."

He was right. For the past few weeks, Donghyuck had been doomed to witness Renjun's  _ summer frustration _ . Every year during summer break there's one particular thing Renjun got really upset or worked up about. Donghyuck blamed it on the overload of free time, that can be an absolute curse if you don't know how to fill it and end up spending ten weeks overthinking everything. 

This year it was Renjun's girlfriend of four months, Heejin. They got together after being paired up for a biology project and were basically inseparable for the first two weeks of their relationship. That's when things started changing. Renjun tried to convince everyone (including himself) that there was nothing going wrong, but still, they slowly developed this weird habit of avoiding each other and now they were stuck.

Donghyuck tried talking to Renjun about it multiple times before, but couldn't get anything out of him. His guess was that Renjun's feelings for Heejin were still there, but maybe not quite enough for their relationship to work like it used to. And Renjun being Renjun didn't want to deal with that because he was aware of the inevitable outcome, breaking up.

"Have you talked to Heejin by now?" Donghyuck asked carefully, observing Renjun picking at the skin on his fingers, a nervous habit of his.

"No, and she keeps calling me."

"You didn't pick up?"

Renjun turned to face him, eyebrows knitted in disbelief. "Of course not."

It was time for Donghyuck to be a good best friend and knock out some great advice, even though he knew that the other wouldn't listen to him anyway. "Seriously Renjun, you need to go talk to her. Getting drunk won't fix your issues."

Renjun held up their eye contact for a short second, then looked away. Donghyuck didn't miss the subtle hint of guilt in his eyes. "I know that," he choked out. "I'm just really confused because I don't know what's causing this frustration… both emotionally and sexually." 

Seeing the questioning look on his best friend's face ordered him to elaborate further. "Whenever I wanted to kiss someone it was her and now I don't know anymore. It's like my body wants someone but I don't know who that person is." Renjun sighed, "I promise I'll talk to her tomorrow if you accompany me tonight. Just to make sure I'm not whoring around when I'm still technically in a relationship."

Donghyuck placed his warm hand on Renjun's small one, squeezing it reassuringly. "Of course Juni, don't worry, I'm here for you."

  
  


* * *

If there was one person Donghyuck didn't expect to run into at this weird college party, it was his older brother Doyoung.

"Shouldn't you be at Applebee's for your night shift?" Donghyuck greeted him after coming into the kitchen to get himself a refill and noticing the familiar tall figure leaning against the fridge.

Doyoung whipped his head around, frowning when he recognized who was standing next to him. "My shift is on Tuesday. But what the hell are you doing here, Donghyuck?"

"I'm here with-"

"Oh! Doyoung hyung is here too!" 

The two brothers shared a quick look before a wild Renjun appeared, wrapping one arm forcefully around Donghyuck's neck, making him flinch out of surprise. If it wasn't already obvious by the red cup in his hand and his hyper appearance, the strong smell of alcohol in the air when Renjun opened his mouth would be a dead-ass giveaway he was already somewhere on the drunk spectrum.

"You brought Renjun here too?" As always, Doyoung was expecting all questionable decisions were made by his brother.

"Oh no, it was my idea to come," Renjun jumped in answering before Donghyuck got a chance to. "I really wanted to get drunk so I asked Hyucki to come along and make sure I don't do anything stupid." He added a little giggle at the end, but his drunken state hindered him from realizing how there really was nothing to laugh about and that no-one joined in. 

Renjun was that kind of drunk that laughed about close to anything. Donghyuck loved to hear his best friend laugh and have a good time, but knowing that it was all just the alcohol and the reason he got drunk in the first place was how frustrated he was, made him more sad than happy.

Doyoung glanced at the cup in his little brother's hands. Donghyuck quickly figured out what he was implying and waved his concern off. "Don't worry, I'm not getting drunk. I just need a little something to endure all those intoxicated people around me."

"Anyways," Renjun changed the topic, bouncing up and down on his feet. "How have you been hyung? Ever since you moved out for college I haven't heard of you." 

Considering that Donghyuck and Renjun had been best friends since they were six, it was a given that he build up some kind of friendship with his older brother too. The two younger boys had a lot of fun playing pranks on Doyoung and annoying the life out of him, but he had always made sure to pay them back whenever he was assigned to look after them. Cleaning the house and mowing the lawn were only two of the hundreds of things he'd make them do, threatening them with his knowledge about their occasional school ditching to go to the movies when no-one else was there.

"I'm fine," Doyoung answered but didn't really put any effort in sounding convincing. "Just a little stressed because of my part-time job."

Donghyuck prayed that the way his body stiffened wasn't too obvious and his brother wouldn't pick up on it. With perched up ears, he followed the conversation, begging for it to not go into the direction he worried it would.

"You know, someone broke the stick shift in our car two weeks ago and my parents blamed me! I always take such good care of it, I'd never be dumb enough to break something. I'm sure it was dad's fault, he's always so reckless when he changes the gear."

A wave of panic went through Donghyuck's entire body as he swallowed down the guilt. Yes, it really wasn't Doyoung's fault, but Donghyuck's. 

Like mentioned before, summer break was the most boring time of the year and in Donghyuck's case, it was only a matter of time until he would come up with something stupid and foolish. On that particular Friday afternoon, he snatched the car keys out of his dad's jacket and sneaked into the garage without anyone noticing. His parents were taking a nap on the hollywood swing in the garden so they probably wouldn't need them anyway.

The start of this makes it sound like he made a round trip, driving the car through the city without a license because that'd be a cool story, right? Well, that wasn't quite what happened.

The moment Donghyuck put his ass on the driver seat and positioned the key in front of the keyhole, he noticed something dangling from the rearview mirror, pretty close to his face. It was one of those moments in which two seconds feel like two whole minutes. His eyes slowly focused on the thing and he could make out the little legs moving around the string coming out of the top. It was probably just his imagination but he swore he could even make out the spider's hairy body, even though it was barely the size of his thumbnail.

Once he realized there was a fucking spider in such close proximity to his face, his body started moving on its own. In this case meaning, he threw his whole body to the side to get as much space between him and the scariest creature on this planet as possible. Donghyuck wasn't necessarily that heavy, but ramming into something fullweight was still enough to break it. 

That, he had learned that day.

"You really managed to break the stick shift?" Renjun had asked him with tears in his eyes from laughing too hard. Donghyuck didn't feel like laughing though, he wanted to cry most of all. After realizing what he had done and the panic began to settle in his chest, he fled, quickly putting the keys back into his dad's coat pocket and running over to Renjun's house. 

Looking back on it, he didn't really expect anything else from his best friend than to laugh and make fun of him. Then again, it did make him feel better at that moment because that's the natural effect the small boy had on Donghyuck. "Maybe it's not even that noticeable? Calm down, there's nothing you can do to fix it now."

So that's what he attempted to do, calm down. He was quite successful until later that day when he came home onto his dad arguing with his older brother about the broken car. Donghyuck stayed quiet even when his dad told Doyoung to get a job to pay the repair fee.

Doyoung wasn't lazy but loved to do the bare minimum which is why he didn't have his own car. Getting a part-time job was something he always hated just the thought of and seeing as their family wasn't that poor, his parents were fine with paying for the small amount of rent and food. The flat he shared with his friends was right next to campus, so he didn't need a car anyway. 

Only on some occasions, when he did have to go somewhere further away, he came home and took the family car. It was all really messy and chaotic and Donghyuck already got used to public transportation in order to escape getting involved in this dumb arrangement with three other people who seemed to need the car 24/7.

"Oh yeah, the car," Renjun said, remembering the whole ordeal. "It's so funny though, right Hyucki? Have you told him already?"

Donghyuck almost choked on his own spit and his hands were sweaty. If his family found out about what really happened, his parents would kill him. He didn't just steal the car keys, which was something his dad had always been really sensitive about, but he also broke the fucking car. Actually, his parents wouldn't even get a chance to kill him because the moment Doyoung finds out about the truth, he'll choke him to death.

"Tell me  _ what _ ?" Doyoung demanded, eyes now back on his little brother. He knew there was something they were trying to hide from him.

There are different types of drunk people, some can't stop giggling whilst others are able to find the most ridiculous reasons to take off every single piece of clothing on their body. Renjun was a mixture between the giggly type and the careless type. The latter caused him to reveal every secret under the sun if Donghyuck didn’t make sure to change the topic quickly enough before he did some real damage.

But in this case, it was already too late. Donghyuck had to act quickly. He couldn't weigh out his options anymore. It was all about damage control at this point.

"Tell you that-"

Donghyuck didn't know where the sudden idea to shut up Renjun with a kiss came from, but it was by far the only one he managed to come up with within two seconds. Even though the kiss was basically just them pressing their lips together, it still triggered Donghyuck's stomach to turn and his brain was busy pushing away the thoughts about how soft Renjun's lips were. The first few seconds after Donghyuck finally pulled away were filled with silent stares and wide eyes from both sides.

For a brief moment, Donghyuck was frozen, trying to process what his panicked self had just done in order to save himself. 

The guilt was spreading so quickly in his body, he simply couldn't return Renjun's gaze any longer. Donghyuck turned around to his brother, who had his eyebrows raised so high, they were almost completely hidden under his bangs. “Tell you that we’re dating!” Hyuck stated, fake excitement dripping from his words, but thankfully the alcohol made him sound more believable. 

“I don’t know if I ever told you, but I’m kinda bisexual so you know...” The awkward silence was insufferable, pushing Donghyuck to add something to his statement. “Please don’t tell mom and dad though, I don’t wanna end up on the streets at just seventeen, I still have a life to live.”

A few seconds passed before Doyoung managed to snap himself out of his state of shock. He cleared his throat and opened his mouth to say something, but it seemed like he was at a total loss for words. 

“O-of course not… I…” 

Doyoung looked back and forth between Renjun and Donghyuck until he latched forward and embraced them both in a big tight hug. “I’m so proud of you two for taking this huge step. You’re an adorable couple and I won’t hesitate to beat up whoever thinks he has the right to make homophobic comments.”

He squeezed the boys one last time before turning away and leaving them alone. Donghyuck heard his older brother sniffle, but he didn’t know if it was just for the effect or because he was actually getting emotional. Either way, he’ll find a way to tease him about it.

Now that he got the first problem out of the way, he had to focus on what to do with the boy staring holes into his back - the boy whose taste he still had on his lips.

Renjun’s expression was unreadable, brows furrowed and eyes glued to the ground as soon as he noticed that Donghyuck had turned around. He looked surprisingly sober for someone who was tumbling around just a minute ago.

"Look, I'm sorry Renjun, it was just to prevent you from spilling the tea about the car and getting me in trouble. It didn't mean anything, you know that, right?"

Renjun finally looked up at him but the smile, that was there before Doyoung started asking further questions, had disappeared completely. Donghyuck didn't know what to say, hell, he didn't even know what to think. What did Renjun's reaction mean? Why did he decide to kiss him in the first place? Was there really nothing else he could've come up with?

Before Donghyuck managed to get another wave of apologies out of his mouth, Renjun's gaze dropped back down to the floor and what felt like two seconds later, he was already running out of the door.

"What the hell just happened?" Donghyuck asked himself, tears daring to spill from his eyes.

Only on his way home, it dawned him, that he not only kissed his best friend, who was still kind of taken, but he also outed himself in front of his brother, just like that. It wasn't like he had to lie - he figured that part of himself out a while ago, but not once did he tell someone about it, not even Renjun. 

Well, now it was out…  _ he _ was out.

  
  


* * *

The guilt was heavy on Donghyuck's shoulders when he opened the squeaky gate of Renjun's garden. It had been two days since the kiss, two days since he last talked to his best friend, and he felt like shit. The whole situation was still eating away at him and now he didn't even have Renjun to whine to about it.

Confronting him was probably the last thing Donghyuck wanted to do, but he knew it was inevitable if he didn't want to lose his best friend.

Donghyuck’s eyes immediately went to the hammock in which he had expected to find his small friend, but it was empty. The fluffy pink pillow inside looked squished as if someone was laying on top of it just a moment ago.

He was about to call his name when he noticed the pale figure lying in the middle of the grass. Renjun’s arm was placed on top of his face to block out the sun and one of his legs was slightly angled. Donghyuck's heart started beating at the speed of lightning, seeing the familiar brown hair being shun on by the bright sunlight. He always admired Renjun's hair for how healthy and shiny it looked, like a real-life commercial.

Donghyuck knew that Renjun was aware of his presence, thanks to the loud garden gate, but he didn't let it show. In fact, he didn't move a single muscle since Donghyuck entered his garden. It was obvious he didn't want him here.

Swallowing down his nervousness and anxiety, Donghyuck stepped forward and walked over to his best friend, who at this moment, was making him feel like he was in a fight or flight situation. Despite the fear in his chest, Donghyuck managed to make his way over and sit down next to Renjun without tripping over his own feet, and even his voice once he started talking, didn't sound as shaky and weird as he had expected.

"Renjun, I'm sorry," he started, looking down on his shoes and realizing only now that he forgot to tie his right shoe. Wow, was he really that nervous? 

Even though Renjun still didn't move, he seemed to be a bit more tense now. Donghyuck could tell by how inconsistent his breathing had gotten, and he wasn't sure if that was making him even more nervous himself or relieved because they were kind of sitting in the same boat. He took another deep breath before continuing.

"I'm sorry for kissing you. I should've asked you or something, but I was panicking and trying to save my own ass." An awkward cough left his throat as he thought back to what happened. What confused him most wasn't actually  _ why _ he ended up doing it, but more just the fact that he wouldn't want to take back the kiss, even if he could. "I don't want things to get weird between us."

Renjun still didn't say a word and if Donghyuck didn't know better, he would've probably believed he was asleep. Seconds dragged by as he waited for a reply, but Renjun never broke the silence. 

Donghyuck let his gaze wander over his friend's face. When they were younger, he used to try to get Renjun to audition for some role on TV or a modeling job. His face was so well structured and his skin so flawless, it made his stomach feel all weird.

"I know you're straight and it's disgusting that I told Doyoung we're dating… I actually explained everything to him and talked to my parents about the car and that it was all my fault."

Renjun's position changed completely in a matter of two seconds, now sitting up and finally daring to look Donghyuck in the eyes. "Why did you do that? Your mom is going to ground you for months."

Finally hearing Renjun's voice after days of not talking made Donghyuck want to smile wider than his mouth allowed, but considering how much tension there still was between them, he kept a straight face. It was nice, seeing the concern on his face and hearing it in his voice. Looks like he wasn't that mad after all.

"I had to give them some kind of explanation when I confessed that I only came up with the idea of us dating because you were about to expose me."

"You could've just made up a lie. After all, that's what you're best at." The bitterness in Renjun's voice hit Donghyuck like a punch in the guts.

"I'm just sick of lying all the time, I guess." Donghyuck sighed, his gaze dropping down to his shoes again.

"Me too," Renjun mumbled, shifting so he was now facing his friend. Donghyuck returned his gaze curiously, not knowing what he was referring to exactly.

"What are you..."

Donghyuck's voice slowly died down when he realized what Renjun was doing. He was leaning in, his face getting closer and closer… 

And Donghyuck didn't stop him. Why wasn't he trying to stop him?

Instead, he just watched Renjun's face getting closer and eventually, felt the soft pair of lips, that seemed to have only gotten softer since last time, pressed against his own. The way Renjun's mouth moved on top of Donghyuck's was making him feel dizzy. It was like, deep down, this is what he had been hoping for since he stepped foot into this garden ten minutes ago.

It felt like it had been an eternity until Renjun started leaning back, but it still wasn't enough for Donghyuck and he barely kept himself from chasing the other's lips.

He was obviously confused, but for now, the fond smile on Renjun's face gave him enough reassurance to stay calm and wait patiently for him to explain himself.

"I'm sick of lying too."

Donghyuck stayed quite. He wanted him to spit out everything that was on his mind to fully understand what his intentions were.

"I think I know now why I've been so frustrated lately," Renjun said, his voice quiet. "It seems like I've had a crush on you all this time." 

Donghyuck expected him to sound sad or disappointed about this realization, but Renjun surprised him by laughing like he just made a joke. That really didn't help Donghyuck's overall confusion in the slightest. 

"I should've known that I'm not straight, I mean- I have a rainbow hammock for fuck's sake."

Donghyuck didn't know how to react as he never got confessed to before. For the first time in his life, Donghyuck was at a loss for words. 

"It's okay if you don't feel the same way… I just wanted you to know. I'm sorry if I ruined our friendship."

Renjun was good at hiding his feelings, so good that even Donghyuck had problems seeing through him sometimes. He never saw his best friend getting nervous to the point where it was basically written on his forehead, when your voice gets shaky and your palms all sweaty. Well, today was a completely different day entirely. 

Looking back, it would've been weird if he wasn't nervous, seeing as he not only just confessed to his crush, but there was also his most important friendship on the line.

After Donghyuck still didn't open his mouth like the freaking coward he was, Renjun got up and started to leave. The smile that was plastered on his face was fake through and through. 

Donghyuck didn't even consciously tell his body to move, but his left arm reached out to quickly grab Renjun's hand and stop him from leaving. "Don't."

Renjun hesitated. It was in those five seconds, that Donghyuck realized how much he genuinely wanted this. He couldn't even hold back the sigh of relief when Renjun finally sat back down next to him.

"Look, I don't know what's going on because I've never really thought about the possibility of us being… you know… like this," Donghyuck whispered and held up their intertwined hands. 

"But it honestly doesn't sound that bad.”


End file.
